How Mau Belen lets her actions silence doubters

In celebration of Pride Month, PBA 3x3 champion coach talks about overcoming discrimination and proving she belongs
Jun 17, 2023
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MUCH can be said about the success enjoyed by decorated PBA 3x3 head coach Mau Belen of the TNT Triple Giga, but all the good things didn’t come without challenges along the way.

At the moment, Coach Mau is the only female head tactician in the PBA – either in the 3x3 or 5-on-5. On top of that, she is also one of the few sportspeople in the country that are open and out of the closet when it comes to sexuality.

See SOTY 2021: Coach Mau Belen breaks barriers

Despite continuously and consistently proving her worth on the sidelines with TNT, which she steered to the first-ever grand slam in PBA 3x3, Coach Mau still consistently faces discrimination both as a woman, and a member of the queer community.

SPIN.ph sat down with the four-time PBA 3x3 champion this Pride Month to explore the various challenges and unique experiences of being a loud and proud lesbian coach in the Philippine basketball scene.

Like any other journey to discovering herself, Coach Mau was aware that it was no easy task for her to come into terms with who she was. But, being a varsity player since her high school days, she was able to find a safe place in the basketball courts.

Surrounded by players who mostly expressed themselves in similar ways, Coach Mau said she felt comfortable being who she was when she had a basketball in her hand.

“Just like any other story, it’s not really smooth sailing, how we ended up here and how we ended up like this,” said Belen.

Though struggling to put a label on herself, Belen bared that she didn’t feel that much different among her peers in basketball, since it wasn’t “uncommon” among female players to be a bit boyish, and more ragged.

But things changed when Belen began to branch out of the sport, now away from her peers, she felt the reality of it all hit her smack in the face when she took a job in the United Arab Emirates.

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“The discrimination is very evident,” she said of expressing herself in Dubai, where, unlike her other female colleagues, she dressed more masculine – wearing shirts and pants instead of blouses and skirts.

Suddenly, in the bigger picture of things, she found it harder to be herself.

“When you step out of that field, when you’re not playing basketball, when you’re not at school, when you’re just outside the mall, with your family even, I mean, how are you supposed to act? That’s a little bit of a journey, I should say, that I had to go through as well,” she said.

Even as she reveled in the journey of self discovery, the basketball tactician knew she needed help at that time, and when she found it, she grew out of her shell.

“I had to look for people to help me [in] finding out if it’s okay to be me, to be like this,” said Belen, who said she turned to queer friends, and a cousin who was already out of the closet.

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Coach Mau drew inspiration that if they could do it, then why couldn’t she?

“It was more of if she can handle herself like that, she’ll be confident, she looks beautiful, he looks beautiful, then why can’t I? You know, that’s where it started, really,” she said.

She also let her work do the talking, regardless of her sexuality.

“When I started to carry myself with a little bit of confidence because I know what I’m doing, and because I’m confident with the work that I’m doing, it just goes from there.”

Mau Belen

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But even as Belen grew sure of herself, it didn’t mean that the challenges stopped.

Once she stepped into her role of head coach in the PBA 3x3, many were quick to judge her – first as a woman, and then as a lesbian.

“With my peers, I’m really lucky, because I haven’t really felt discriminated [against] because I’m gay. [But] I’m sometimes feeling, I feel [treated] unfairly because I’m a woman. Do you get my point?” she said.

“You know, minsan mas najujudge pa ako dahil babae ako hindi dahil gay ako. Siguro nga kasi, in the container, ako lang yung nandoon eh. Ako lang yung babae sa mix eh. So siguro, before they can even look at the next layer that you were talking about, dun muna ako natitira dun sa una, sa pagiging babae.”

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    Belen isn’t one to get shy about all that she’s done in the short time that she’s been calling the shots for the Triple Giga. But sometimes, she’s taken aback about some of the comments she receives.

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    Adding to the hurt of being attacked because of her gender and her sexuality, Coach Mau primarily struggles with the idea that the people spewing hate have no idea who she is.

    “[It’s] more on the people that don’t know me. What I’m talking about is in social media, you know, when I post things, sometimes I post some of my achievements, my team’s achievements, you can see comments there that are a little bit off. Sometimes, it’s not even related to what I’m posting,” she said.

    Comments would read statements like “Anong ginagawa niyan jan? Sino ba yang tomboy na yan?”

    “I don’t understand why people in this generation and age are still, you know, basing their judgment on the outer side. When in fact, they don’t know even a single thing about me,” added Belen.

    More than her own feelings, though, Belen is more concerned about the next generation, whom she hopes gets a better environment to grow in – whether as a woman, or as a member of the queer community.

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    “I’m not saying it because it affects me so much, but, for those people that are maybe following me, or maybe looking up sa'kin, I don’t want them to get discouraged just by reading those comments,” said Belen.

    “It’s the kids, it’s the teens, you know, there are a lot of girls that are messaging me, saying that katulad nila ako, or, gusto nila maging ako and what if that message discourages them?”

    That is why in her own little way, the 3x3 whiz is making sure to build the right foundation for young kids – beginning with her players.

    TNT Mau Belen champion PBA 3x3 Season 2 3rd Conference Leg 2

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    “Ako, every person that I encounter in this line of work, and especially the guys, I’m trying to teach them how to respect every human being. Not just by saying it, na yeah, you respect your opponent, and this and that, I am trying to instill in them, sa lahat ng nahahawakan kong players, respect everyone. The kid, the old, the guy, the girl, the lesbian, the gays,” said Belen.

    “Of course, hindi ka naman perfect, one day, magbibiro ka and magsasabi ka ng something and I make sure if I’m in the surroundings, I tell them. I tell them that yeah, that’s a good joke, you know, that’s laughable but for some people, that might hurt them. So just think of what you’re saying, be aware of your surroundings, because there are people that are listening that might get hurt because of your jokes, and things like that.”

    Looking at all her achievements and championships in the PBA 3x3, Coach Mau is more proud of herself for passing on the lesson of respect and being a good person to everyone she encounters.

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    “That’s very important for me, as a leader, as a coach. And those are the things that siguro kayang i-exemplify ng mga players ko. If you talk to them, you know, and if you have a chat with them, if you may be friends with them, it’s one thing na maipagmamalaki ko siguro, more than anything, is how I teach them the right respect that everyone deserves.”

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